Thank you British Waterways*

So, these new knobby handle things on the paddle pawls (I bet there's a proper name for them, but hey, there's a picture) have an interesting feature; they're just the right height to get stuck up the leg of my boating shorts as I cross a lock gate. Thankfully any results were comedic rather than tragic, but it could have all gone horribly, horribly wrong...

* I know. But they title refers to a rather jolly (if unrepresentative) song by Philip Jeays, which you can listen to here - but do try things like Richenda or Idiots in Uniforms too. So, the title stays, until Phil writes a song about Banal Liver Rust, which I believe is a minor disease that cattle get, spread by white Range Rovers (never has a car colour been so pointless - would anyone take it anywhere near the mud?)